Jomit's Blog

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

The Companies have redefined themselves as

1. INFOSYS: Inferior Offline Systems
2. WIPRO: Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output
3. HCL: Hidden Costs & Losses
4. TCS: Totally Confusing Solutions
5. C-DOT: Coffee During Office Timings
6. HUGHES: Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping
7. BAAN: Beggars Association And Nerds
8. IBM: Implicitly Boring Machines
9. SATYAM: Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly
10. PARAM: Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors
11. HP: Hen Pecked
12. AT & T: All Troubles & Terrible
13. CMC: Coffee, Meals and Comfort
14. DEC: Drifting and Exhausted Computers
15. BFL: Brainwash First and Let them go
16. DELL: Deplorable Equipment and Lack Luster
17. TISL: Totally Inconsistent Systems Limited
18. PSI: Peculiar Symptoms of India
19. PCL: Poor Computers Limited
20. SPARC: Simply Poor And Redundant Computers
21. SUN: Surely Useless Novelties
22. CRAY: Cry Repeatedly After An Year
23. TUL: Troubles Un Limited
24 CTS: Coffee Tea and Snacks
25. ICIM: Impossible Computers In Maintenance
26. BPL: Below Poverty Line
27. NIIT: Not Interested in IT
FINALLY
ICICI : Incredible Calls from Irate Customers of India

Friday, June 16, 2006

How ASP.NET Web Pages are Processed on the Web Server

Excellent Article to understand this :

http://aspnet.4guysfromrolla.com/articles/011404-1.aspx

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Good Flash Game

Adjust Things in a Bag :

http://www.funlinx.de/?redirect=2536

Source site : http://www.funlinx.de/

Special Mission

http://hallpass.com/media/specialmission.html

Source site : http://hallpass.com

Monday, May 29, 2006

Latest DIVX Movies & Hindi Songs

http://www.divxcrawler.com/

Download Songs :

www.desim4u.net

www.pakfellows.com (rashid/rashid)

SQL Server Database Best Practices,

http://www.sql-server-performance.com/vk_sql_best_practices.asp

Friday, May 26, 2006

Knowledge Management Vs Skill Management

Point 1:
KM Involves capturing the knowledge of employees and sharing it so that it is available for others to use.
SM merely focuses on application of Knowledge to find Solution
In brief, KM is learning and SM is applying what has been learnt. Such application of skill may result in improvement over earlier learning and thus knowledge but not necessarily improvement of skill. Thus Knowlede is dynamic.
-----------
Point 2
KM is a Learning Technique
SM is a Problem Solving Technique
-----------
Point 3
KM starts from individual and ends in sharing.
SM starts with sharing and ends up in individuals ability
------------
Point 4
Knowledge Management uses experience gained out of failures and also success.
Skill is strongly measured based on only success of solving problems.
------------
Point 5
Knowledge is an intellectual property.
Skill is one of the means of producing intellectual property.
------------
Point 6
Knowledge is relative.
Skill is individualistic.
-----------
Point 7
Knowledge is implicit.
Skill is explicit.
-----------
Point 8
KM is a measure of the VALUE of the Organization.
SM is the measure of the ABILITY of the Organization.

Family Joke

A Patel family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their deadmother arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the daughters. The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it Whenthey opened the lid , they found a letter on top addressed to herbrothersand sisters:

Dear Chandrakantbhai,Arvindbhai, Mohan and Varsha, I am sending Ba\'s body to you, since it washer wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our ancestral homein GUJARAT. Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leave isconsumed. You will find inside the coffin, under Ba\'s body, 12 cans of cheese, 10 packets of Toblerone chocolates and 8 packets ofBadam. Please divide these among all of you. On Ba\'s feet you will findanew pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan. There are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha\'s and Lakshmi\'s sons. Hope the sizes are correct. Ba iswearing 6 American T-Shirts. The large size is for Mohan. Justdistributethe rest among yourselves. The 2 new Jeans that Ba\'s is wearing are for the boys. The Swiss watch thatReema wanted is on Ba\'s left wrist. Shanta masi, Ba is wearing the necklace, earrings and ringthat you asked for. Please take them off her. The 6 white cotton socksthat Ba is wearing must be divided among my nephews. Please distribute allthese fairly.

Love , Smita PatelPS: And if anything more required let me know soon as Bapuji is also notfeeling too well nowadays.

Good Facts

=> Coca-Cola was originally green.

=>The most common name in the world is Mohammed.

=>The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

=>There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.

=>TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on
one row of the keyboard.

=>Women blink nearly twice as much as men!!

=>You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.

=>It is impossible to lick your elbow.

=>People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart
stops for a millisecond.

=>If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a
sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

=>Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history.
Spades - King David
Clubs - Al! exander the Great,
Hearts - Charlemagne
Diamonds - Julius Caesar.

=>111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

=>Honey is the only food that doesn't spoil.

=>A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

=>A snail can sleep for three years.

=>All polar bears are left handed.

=>American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from
each salad served in first-class.

=>Butterflies taste with their feet.

=>Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.

=>Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

=>The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

=>The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

=>The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to
squirt blood 30 feet.

=>Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over
million descendants.

=>Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear
by 700 times.

=>The cigarette lighter was ! invented before the match.

=>Most lipstick contains fish scales.

=>Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different.

Never Give Up

Think the Unthinkable

A first-grade teacher, Ms Neelam (Age 22) was having trouble with one of her students
The teacher asked,"Boy. What is your problem?"
Boy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"
Ms Neelam had enough. She took Boy. to the principal's office.
While the boy waited in the out of the office, the teacher explained to the Principal what the situation was.
The principal told Ms Neelam he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.She agreed.
Boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Boy: "9"
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Boy: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know. The principal looks at Ms Neelam and tells her, "I think Boy can go to the third-grade."
Ms Neelam says to the principal, "I have some of my own questions. Can I ask him?" The principal and boy both agree.
Ms Neelam asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Boy, aft! er a moment "Legs."
Ms Neelam: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
Boy: "Pockets."
Ms Neelam: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, and delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy: Coconut
Ms Neelam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky? (The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, boy was taking charge)
Boy: Bubblegum
Ms Neelam: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs? The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...
Boy: Shake hands
Ms Neelam: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay? Boy: Yep.
Ms Neelam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.
Boy: Tent
Ms Neelam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first. The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one large Patiala Vodka peg.
Boy: Wedding Ring
Ms Neelam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
Boy: Nose
Ms Neelam: I have a! stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Boy: Arrow
Ms Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of heat and excitement?
Boy: Firetruck
Ms Neelam: What word starts with! a 'F' and ends in 'K' & if u dont get it u have to use your hand.
Boy: Fork
Ms Neelam: hat is it that all men have one of it's longer on some men than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after they're married? Boy: SURNAME
Ms Neelam: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of veins, like pumping, & is > responsible for making love?
Boy: HEART.
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said > to the teacher, "Send this Boy to Delhi University , I got the last ten questions wrong myself!"

Regular Expression Library

http://www.regxlib.com/default.aspx

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Some Facts

1. Chewing on gum while cutting onions can help a person from stop producing tears. Try it next time you chop onions!!!!!!!!!!

2. Until babies are six months old, they can breathe and swallow at the same time. Indeed convenient!

3. Offered a new pen to write with, 97% of all people will write their own name.

4. Male mosquitoes are vegetarians. Only females bite.

5. The average person's field of vision encompasses a 200-degree wide angle.

6. To find out if a watermelon is ripe, knock it, and if it sounds hollow then it is ripe.

7. Canadians can send letters with personalized postage stamps showing their own photos on each stamp.

8. Babies' eyes do not produce tears until the baby is approximately six to eight weeks old.

9. It snowed in the Sahara Desert in February of 1979.

10. Plants watered with warm water grow larger and more quickly than plants watered with cold water.

11. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times. 12. Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave.

13. Those stars and colors you see when you rub your eyes are called phosphenes.

14. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

15. Everyone's tongue print is different, like fingerprints.

16. Contrary to popular belief, a swallowed chewing gum doesn't stay in the gut. It will pass through the system and be excreted.

17. At 40 Centigrade a person loses about 14.4 calories per hour by breathing.

18. There is a hotel in Sweden built entirely out of ice; it is rebuilt every year.

19. Cats, camels and giraffes are the only animals in the world that walk rightfoot, right foot, left foot, left foot, rather than right foot, left foot...

20. Onions help reduce cholesterol if eaten after a fatty meal.

21. The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting.

Hindi Letter

Purchase land on Moon

http://www.lunarregistry.com/

Good Morning

Million, Billion, Trillion... ......

Number of zeros
U.S. & scientific community
Other countries

3
thousand
thousand
6
million
million
9
billion
1000 million (1 milliard)
12
trillion
billion
15
quadrillion
1000 billion
18
quintillion
trillion
21
sextillion
1000 trillion
24
septillion
quadrillion
27
octillion
1000 quadrillion
30
nonillion
quintillion
33
decillion
1000 quintillion
36
undecillion
sextillion
39
duodecillion
1000 sextillion
42
tredecillion
septillion
45
quattuordecillion
1000 septillion
48
quindecillion
octillion
51
sexdecillion
1000 octillion
54
septendecillion
nonillion
57
octodecillion
1000 nonillion
60
novemdecillion
decillion
63
vigintillion
1000 decillion
66 - 120
undecillion - vigintillion
303
centillion

600
centillion